Picture of Meredith Sadoulet standing in front of a projection screen that says "Disability Policy Seminar 2025"

Meet Meredith Sadoulet, The Arc’s National Board President

If you’ve been following The Arc’s work this year, you’ve already felt Meredith Sadoulet’s steady influence. She stepped into the role of Board President in January, and while she’s not new to the job anymore, many in our community may still be getting to know her. Meredith is thoughtful, values-driven, and deeply committed to creating a future where disability doesn’t limit opportunity. She’s a member of the disability community herself, a family member to people with disabilities, and a professional with years of experience leading workforce strategy and inclusion at Fortune 100 companies.

Before she officially took the helm, Meredith shared a powerful message at our National Convention—part reflection, part vision-setting, and a reminder of why The Arc exists in the first place. We’re sharing her message here with you. If you haven’t met Meredith yet, now’s your chance to get to know her.

“Having assumed the role of National Board President for the 2025-2026 term, I am deeply honored by the privilege and responsibility to serve an organization with a rich history of advocacy and a steadfast commitment to protecting and advancing the rights of people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. For 75 years, The Arc has been a driving force for inclusion, and I am in awe of the collective impact of our nearly 600 chapters, their leaders and staff, and the communities we serve every day.”

“I imagine that each of us on this journey of advocacy with The Arc has a personal story about when our advocacy began. I can pinpoint the moment when the advocacy flame was lit inside of me. I recall being presented with a diagnosis and a fact sheet from the World Health Organization that accompanied it. The facts remain nearly the same as the ones I read over a decade ago: people with disabilities have poorer health outcomes, experience stigma, discrimination, poverty, and exclusion from education and employment, and more. This information being presented to me as fact—as a certain future—was the moment that lit my fire. Not just as an advocate for one, but as an advocate for all. I became someone who wanted to dedicate as much of my energy and skills as possible toward changing these outcomes.”

“As a person with disabilities (OCD and anxiety disorder), I’m a proud member of the disability community, and I’m grateful that my journey brought me to The Arc.

I’d like to imagine a new set of facts for the disability community.

What if a new fact sheet said:
‘Welcome to your community. You are part of one of the most powerful, connected communities on the planet. Your future is bright. Why? Because people with disabilities are likely to experience inclusive education, employment with robust pay and benefits, personal growth, security, and joy. Oh, and not just that. You’re more likely to help solve big, gnarly problems because this world wasn’t designed with you in mind, and yet you know how to navigate it. You’re more likely to spark innovation with products, services, and spaces—not just for yourself, but for everyone—because YOU bring value and insight to this world. Because you’re a person with a disability, you’re more likely to be a changemaker, both through the work you do and through the insight you bring to others.’

This is the world I wake up to every day trying to help build. And I’m honored to be on the journey with all of you.

So, how will we get there?

I’ve chosen three guiding values for my term as President:

  1. Leadership by People With Disabilities
    We must ensure more people with disabilities, including those with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD), are in positions of leadership and influence at a local, state, national, and global level. People with disabilities should not only have a seat at the table, but at the head of it, making decisions, influencing outcomes, and leading. We need systems shaped by lived experience, and we must commit to moving self-determination from theory to practice.
  2. Strategic Focus to Make Meaningful Change
    From my time in large Fortune 100 companies, I’ve seen how easily priorities competing for attention can pile up and momentum gets lost. I hope we don’t try to tackle 50 things over the next 2 years. I hope we stay focused where we can make meaningful change, so that 2 years from now, we can point to real, permanent change we made together on a nationwide level. With one voice, one consistent and memorable introduction of who we are and what we do, one aligned strategy and focused set of priorities, I know we can make impact together.
  3. Many Chapters & Constituents of The Arc, Yet One Community
    Across nearly 600 chapters, The Arc represents diverse communities, geographies, beliefs, and needs. We will honor those differences, yet try to seek commonality, knowing that we are stronger as one community. The Arc is strongest when we advocate as one voice for and with people with IDD.

Thank you for the chance to share my story, and my vision for our shared work. I’d love to hear your advocacy story, too. You can connect with me on LinkedIn. Together, let’s keep building a world where people with disabilities live with dignity, respect, and opportunity—and where the facts finally reflect that.

A picture of a young man in a wheelchair with two adults by his side on a baseball field

How One Day at the Ballpark Meant the World to Families With Disabilities

What does a perfect day look like for a family that’s often navigating a world that excludes them? On July 9, families connected to The Arc of Ohio found out, thanks to our national partnership with Lids and the Lids Foundation.

It was a day full of joy, connection, and the kind of belonging that too often feels out of reach. And it all happened because a company chose to step up and demonstrate their commitment to valuing people with disabilities.

The day began at the Lids store in Kenwood Towne Center, where each family was paired with a Lids team member. Together, they picked out hats and shirts, added personal touches with custom stitching, and got to know one another. Lids gave each child a $250 gift card to shop, and it quickly became more than just a shopping trip. It was a chance for kids to feel seen, valued, and empowered.

Then came the main event.

At Great American Ball Park, families got VIP treatment from the moment they arrived. They watched batting practice from the field, met Cincinnati Reds pitcher Brent Suter, and felt welcomed by every staff member they encountered. Before the first pitch, families received gift cards to buy food, thanks to the Reds Community Fund. That small act made it even easier to just enjoy the moment. Then everyone settled into an accessible seating area and watched the Reds take home a win against the Marlins.

It was an evening full of energy and unforgettable moments:

  • A picture of a young man in a wheelchair with two adults by his side on a baseball fieldLogan, who has autism and is non-verbal, lit up as he explored the stadium with his parents and sister
  • Noah, who has cerebral palsy and is non-verbal, beamed as his aide cheered alongside him
  • Coralie, who has Williams syndrome, wore her new Reds cap proudly while enjoying stadium snacks with her mom and brother
  • Daniel and Evie, siblings with autism and Down syndrome, chanted in the stands with their parents
  • And Lids staff laughed, danced, and even went down the giant slide—because the kids asked them to

Jen Powers Alge, a mom and staff member at The Arc of Ohio, shared:
“The families were thrilled to have such an exciting experience. The employees at the Lids store were so warm and fun to shop with. Batting practice had the kids smiling from ear to ear, and the moms and dads were in awe of such a cool, inclusive experience. The Lids Foundation thought of everything to make the day safe, fun, inspiring, and engaging. We are so grateful for the ‘best day ever,’ as one of the kids exclaimed.”

Ted Harton, Senior District Sales Manager at Lids who joined the outing, reflected:
“This experience reminded me what really matters. Spending the day with these families, seeing their love, joy, and strength, was truly inspiring. It was a chance to step outside of the everyday and just be present with people who show us what community and family should look like.”

And while this was a single day, it reflects something bigger. Lids continues to grow its partnership with The Arc, from supporting The Arc@School program to launching an in-store campaign that brings our mission to life in more than 1,000 stores.

Katy Neas, CEO of The Arc of the United States, said:
“At a time when too many companies are quietly stepping back from diversity and inclusion, Lids is stepping up and making a real impact. Their support is reaching families nationwide, fueling vital programs, raising awareness, and creating moments of true connection. But this partnership is so meaningful to The Arc and the millions of people with disabilities and their families with whom we advocate. It deepens Lids’ ties to the communities they serve, energizes their employees, and shows their customers what authentic commitment to our shared values looks like. We need more partners who lead with such purpose. Lids is helping to build a more inclusive future for people with disabilities, and we’re proud to move forward together.”

Starting this August, Lids will once again feature The Arc in stores across the country. Shoppers will be invited to round up their purchase to donate to The Arc and customize their gear with The Arc’s logo—another chance to stand with people with disabilities in a meaningful way. See what’s coming this August.

To every family who joined us, and to every Lids employee who made the day so special: thank you. This is what inclusion feels like. And this is what’s possible when we build it together.

An up close photo of a woman with Down syndrome crying in response to the R-word

The Truth About the R-Word, From the People It Hurts Most

The R-word is everywhere again. It’s showing up on social media, in schools, in entertainment, in the media, and in everyday conversations.

People throw it out casually as a joke or a way to tear someone down. But for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD), it has never been “just a word.” It’s a slur—a word used to devalue their worth and humanity.

The disability community has fought for decades to end the use of this word. While we’ve made real progress, its resurgence today is a warning: progress is fragile. Every time this word is spoken, it reinforces outdated and harmful ideas about who belongs, who matters, and who is worthy of respect.

This isn’t a minor slip in language. It’s a sign that empathy, dignity, and basic decency are being lost—and that impacts all of us. Choosing not to say the R-word is a start, but it’s not enough. We need more people to understand why the R-word is offensive, why it’s still harmful, and why it must stop.

Listen to people with IDD who have lived with the weight of this word their entire lives.

Why The R-Word Is Harmful: In Their Own Words

“I am one of those people who was called the R-word simply because I was different my whole life. I tried to tell people how hurtful that was, and that my name was Jill, but no one listened. It made me feel so little and useless. Like many people with IDD, I struggled with not fitting in at school and being fired from jobs after high school because of the wrong fit—all while being called the R-word. I wanted to have friends like everyone else, but instead I was made fun of and ignored. I was so lonely and unhappy in those days. But I learned that having an IDD is nothing to be ashamed of. I’m a caring, loving person trying to find her place in this big world.”
Jill Egle, Louisiana
An up close photo of Shawn, a Black man with a disability
“I have been called the R-word and that makes me feel less than human. It invalidates my experience as a person, and every time I hear that word, it makes me feel like we’re going back to the old days—when they used to use that word to justify putting us in institutions. The R-word Is a dangerous word because it demonizes those who have the disabilities and suggests that we’re not human. I’m scared that they might try to use that word again as a medical term. We cannot let them do that.”
Shawn Aleong, Pennsylvania
An up close photo of Veronica, a Hispanic woman with a disability
“If you use the R-word, it tells me you don’t care about me or people like me. If you use the R-word, it tells me you don’t really respect me or people like me. If you use the R-word, it tells me you don’t know who I really am or what I can do—but it also tells me all I need to know about you.”
Veronica Ayala, Texas
An up close photo of Nicole, a White woman with IDD
“Every time I hear the R-word, I want to run, hide, and curl up into a ball. I was bullied and called the R-word from elementary school to early adulthood. I often wished I was normal. My only friends at school were the teachers on the playground. I also grew up with a brother saying the R-word when he would get pissed off, and it took years to get him and others to understand how harmful it is. We need to stop the R-word now more than ever. It’s just as harmful even if it’s not being said to someone’s face. It’s time to demand a world where people with disabilities—visible or invisible—are respected and accepted for who they are!”
Nicole LeBlanc, Maryland

“The R-word hurts me. I was called the R-word by my school psychologist when I was in kindergarten. They told my parents I would not amount to anything—that I’d always be dependent on someone. Considering where I am today, I would say she was very, very wrong. I am not the only one who has been called this harmful word. Many of us with disabilities still face this same type of ignorance and discrimination.”
Taylor Crisp, Washington State
An up close photo of Ricky, a Black man with IDD
“Back in the day, people referred to people like me as the R-word. We are not that word. We may all communicate differently and have different needs—that is normal. We also have strengths and values. We fought for many years not just to change the use of the R-word, but also the negative thinking about people with IDD. Using this word goes backwards. The younger generation should go forward. I want to see them have an easier time than I had. It is time to finally bury the R-word.”
Ricky Broussard, Texas
An up close photo of Charlotte, a White woman with Down syndrome
“As someone born with a disability, it is heartbreaking that the R-word is still being used. People with disabilities have been trying for a very long time to have their inherent worth and value acknowledged by society, and have campaigned for the R-word to be removed from use. It is disgraceful that we still have to ask for basic respect. The R-word is derogatory and dehumanizing. I wish that people would look beyond themselves and see people with disabilities for who we are and the abilities we have, not just our disability diagnoses. We want to be treated with dignity and respect, just like everyone else.”
Charlotte Woodward, Virginia
An up close photo of Zoe, a Black woman with IDD, with her hands covering her mouth
“The R-word really hurts, even if someone says it as a joke. I’m a person, not a label. I matter, we matter, and everyone deserves to be treated with respect and kindness.”
Zoe-Rebekah Bostic, Georgia

“I was called the R-word for many years in school, especially on the bus. It meant I was dumb or stupid, and I buried my head in books to deal with it. To hear people use that word is demeaning. There’s no real excuse for it. It’s sad that in our schools, this kind of thing isn’t taught. Before you use it again, you should find out what the word means because you have offended me and hundreds of thousands of people by using it.”
Chad Widing, Connecticut
An up close photo of Barb, a White woman with IDD
“In high school, I was called the R-word all the time. It made me shrink away—it felt terrible. I can’t believe it’s coming back. I feel very hurt, especially after we fought to get rid of that word. No one should be called it, even if they “don’t mean it.” We are people, just like everyone else.”
Barbara Coppens, New Jersey
An up close photo of Ray, a White man with IDD
“Back in the 1970s, I was called every name in the book. They called me the R-word, crazy, and other hateful stuff. People told me I didn’t belong in the neighborhood or I didn’t belong at work. That is bullying! It lowered my self-esteem. People who use that word must not have any idea what it’s like to be labeled the R-word. I wish they could walk in my shoes to see how it feels. We need to stop labeling people. We are all somebody. I should be able to freely go into the community without this stigma.”
Ray Schuholz, Michigan
An up close photo of Sarvesh, a Middle Eastern man with IDD
“The R-word makes me feel sad. I feel that I should speak up and ask people to stop using the R-word. The word is ableist and derogatory. It stereotypes people, promotes institutionalization, and encourages eugenics.”
Sarvesh Chandran, Arizona


If reading this made you uncomfortable—good. That means you care.

But not saying the R-word isn’t enough.

Some of the people you’ve heard from here—like Jill, Nicole, and Ricky—have helped lead efforts in their states to remove the R-word from laws and policies. Changing laws is an important step, but changing hearts, language, and culture takes all of us.

We need you to say something when others use the R-word.
We need you to share this blog widely.
We need you to be part of the reason this word finally fades from our culture.

The R-word still hurts. But together, we can make sure it has no place in our future.

Note: Throughout this piece, we’ve chosen to refer to the slur in question as “the R-word,” and we’ve capitalized the R to recognize the serious harm the word represents. Naming it this way centers its weight and impact, without unnecessarily repeating a word that has caused so much pain.

Jonathan Gardner pictured with his dad and Patient Cookie

6 Powerful Father’s Day Stories From People With Disabilities

What makes a great dad or father figure?

For some, it’s a quiet kind of support that needs no spotlight. For others, it’s encouragement, guidance, a sense of safety, or someone who listens without judgment.

Sometimes that person is a biological father. Other times, it’s a stepdad, grandfather, mentor, teacher, or chosen family member. What matters isn’t the label—it’s how they show up and what they make possible. It’s not about being a perfect dad. It’s about being present, flexible, and fiercely in your corner.

For Father’s Day, we asked people with disabilities: How has your dad or a father figure shaped your life?

Here are six real stories about strength, support, and showing up.

Jonathan Gardner pictured with his dad and Patient Cookie

Jonathan and his dad

“When I was 18, I was diagnosed with Ewing’s sarcoma, a rare and aggressive cancer. I also have autism, so I experience sensory things like touch and routine differently. When I found out I needed a port placed in my chest for chemotherapy, I was overwhelmed and scared. But my dad knew exactly what I needed. He gave me a Cookie Monster plush, one of my favorite characters, that had a real chemotherapy port sewn into his chest—just like mine. My dad made sure it looked exactly the way I would look, with tape and bandages too. Being able to feel the port on Cookie Monster helped me understand what was going to happen to my own body. That Cookie Monster, who we named Patient Cookie, came with me to every single appointment. It was like having a piece of my dad with me, especially on the days he couldn’t be there because of work. I am now 3 years Cancer Free and use Patient Cookie to teach medical students through Operation House Call with The Arc of Massachusetts. I use him to show future doctors and nurses that caring for someone with a disability means more than just treating their illness, it means taking the time to understand the whole person. My dad is the perfect example of that. He gave me comfort, safety, and a way to face something scary. He turned my fear into understanding, and that’s just one of the many reasons why my Dad is so important to me, and why I love him so much.”
Jonathan Gardner lives in Massachusetts and has autism

Veronica Ayala pictured sitting next to her stepdad Charlie

Veronica and her stepdad

“My stepdad, Charlie, never tried to replace my father—he wanted to be my friend. I don’t call him Dad, but he’s been more of one than anyone else. He is very reserved but shows his love by being in my corner constantly and occasionally in my apartment with a wrench or a screwdriver. I often hear about how proud he is or how amazing he thinks I am from others. He doesn’t define me by the things I don’t have or can’t do because I have disability. He always just waited for me to tell him what I needed rather than assuming anything about what I couldn’t do. It feels great to know that someone as strong as he thinks that you are just as strong but in a different way. I recently lost my purse with my phone and ID in it before boarding a plane. I was able to contact my sister to let her know I might be stuck at the airport overnight. My mother went into a panic and wanted to jump in the car and bring me back home. Not Charlie. He calmly tells my mom not to worry. “She is a smart girl, she’s going to get herself on the plane and get herself home.” He was right. I talked to the right people, I explained my situation, I got through an extended TSA security check, and I made it on to my flight home. What did Charlie say? “I told you she would do it.” Thank you, Charlie, for always being there and believing in me.”
Veronica Ayala lives in Texas and has cerebral palsy

Marina Agerter sitting at a table with her dad

Marina and her dad

“My dad helped me through my traumatic brain injury [following a car accident]. I was in inpatient therapy and my dad would help me read the Harry Potter books. I lost my ability to read, but it was through practice and hard work and love that I was able to regain my reading ability. When I was discharged to outpatient therapy, he took me home and [my mom and dad] took turns driving me to therapy every day of the week.”
Marina Agerter lives in Virginia and has a traumatic brain injury and aphasia

Ray Simpson's grandma and grandpa sitting next to each other

Ray’s grandparents

“I was adopted and raised by my grandparents when I was very young. I called them mom and dad growing up. My dad, George, was and always will be my best friend. He taught me how to play piano, and we would sit on the bench together and play our favorite tunes. My dad was a priest for the episcopalian church most of his life. Although his faith was strong in his religion, he never judged anyone’s beliefs or culture. He welcomed discussions about life and the world. My dad taught me how to be responsible and independent with finances and to always be prepared. When he passed away in my early twenties, it left a hole in my heart. Each year on Father’s Day, I light a candle and tell him how much he meant to me.”
Ray Simpson lives in Minnesota and has anxiety, sensory processing disorder, chronic nerve damage, and complex regional pain syndrome

Taylor Crisp pictured with her dad

Taylor and her dad

“My dad has been my constant rock throughout my life. He continues to show unconditional love regardless of how old I get. He has been my number one coach and cheerleader—but also the one who teaches me to be tough in times of hardship. My autism and different support needs have never stopped him or prevented him from being the best father he can be. He is the dad that will help me face my fear and insert my dignity of risk because he believes in me and believes I deserve happiness and success. He has gone above and beyond for me, showing me what tough love and unconditional love is like. I also want to recognize my stepdad. From day one, he has been supportive and there for me. I am not only lucky to have one dad, but to have two dads to celebrate.”
Taylor Crisp lives in Washington state and has autism

Mark Dixon reading with his father

Mark and his dad

“My father served as an advocate by attending IEP meetings, reading books about the special education regulations, and making sure I had the right services to receive a free and appropriate education. He also served on a lot of boards to help people with disabilities. When I graduated from high school, my father made sure services were available so I could live in the community as independently as possible. Having watched my Dad advocate for me through the years gave me the desire to advocate for others.”
Mark Dixon lives in Virginia and has cerebral palsy


These Father’s Day stories from the disability community show how deep an impact dads and father figures can have.

To the fathers and father figures: thank you for listening, encouraging, adapting, and advocating. Your impact is lasting.

To the people who shared their stories with us: thank you for your honesty and vulnerability.

And to anyone for whom Father’s Day brings up mixed emotions—whether because of loss, distance, or difficult experiences: you’re not alone. We honor all the ways love and support can take shape.

Ashley Glears, a person with cerebral palsy, pictured with her mom

People With Disabilities Reflect on Their Moms This Mother’s Day

Moms (or the people who love us like moms) are often the ones who just get us. They keep life moving. They see potential where others see limits. And for people with disabilities, that love can take many forms: hands-on care, fierce advocacy, deep listening, and unshakable belief.

Some moms manage feeding tubes, therapy schedules, and school meetings while also working, caregiving for others, and managing their own health. Others cheer their adult children on as they build careers, push for justice, and live life on their own terms.

There’s no one path. No single story. But what many moms share is the everyday power of showing up.

For Mother’s Day, we asked people with disabilities: What impact has your mom or a mother figure had on your life?

Here are six reflections on love, strength, and support.

Ashley Glears pictured with her Mom

Ashley and her mom

“When I was born with cerebral palsy, my mother didn’t panic. She prepared. She understood the meetings that would come. The assumptions. The coded language. The way people talk about disabled children in lowered tones, as if to soften the blow of a life they’ve already decided won’t go far. She didn’t wait for the world to believe in me. She built the foundation herself. She became a speech-language pathologist, not just to help me speak, but to ensure I would never be spoken for. She pulled together a support system, therapists, educators, and friends who worked with me after hours, without compensation, because we didn’t have time to wait for permission. She created access where there was none. She raised me to speak, to move, to lead regardless of whether the system was ready for me. She is still doing the work. Still mentoring. Still reshaping how public schools serve children with disabilities. Still protecting futures because she understands what’s at stake.”
Ashley Glears lives in Maryland and has cerebral palsy with right hemiplegia

Chloe Rothschild pictured with her mom

Chloe and her mom

“My mom is always there for me. Over the years, she has taken me to hundreds, probably thousands, of appointments. She has helped advocate for the services and supports I’ve needed to succeed. She has attended numerous conferences, advocacy trips for board meetings, and other events with me over the past 10 years because she knows how important it is to me to participate in these events. My mom has helped encourage self-advocacy skills in me starting at a young age as she made sure that I was involved in my IEP meetings in some capacity starting at a young age. Even during the harder moments, my mom has always been there by my side. My mom is one of my biggest advocates and supporters.”
Chloe Rothschild lives in Ohio and has autism

Russell Lehmann pictured with his mom

Russell and his mom

“I cannot overstate the impact my mom has had on my life. She has always taken the time to enter my world and meet me where I am, something society rarely does. Autistic individuals are often pressured to fit in so they don’t stand out, to avoid bullying, social rejection, and exclusion. But in doing so, we risk losing ourselves. My mom never let that happen to me. She loved me when it felt like no one else did. She held me, and still holds me, through meltdowns. She sits beside me when I feel lost in a world that doesn’t make sense. Most of all, she truly sees me. She validates my struggles and recognizes the immense effort I put in every day just to achieve what others take for granted. Because of her, I am who I am today. She nurtured within me the belief I so desperately needed as a child; the belief that led me to create my own career. Thank you, Mom. I love you so much.”
Russell Lehmann lives in California and has autism, OCD, depression, and anxiety

Johanne Mayer pictured with her mom

Johanne and her mom

“My mom is my best friend and I couldn’t imagine my life without her. I wouldn’t be who I am and where I am now if it wasn’t for her influence. She always encourages me to go after things I want and her expectations for me have never been lower than my sisters’. She has always made me feel like I’m capable of more than I know. I always try to reach for the stars because of her belief in me. She is the best light in my life.”
Johanne Mayer lives in New Jersey and has Down syndrome

Sydney Badeau pictured with her mom

Sydney and her mom

“My mom has helped me grow over the years. Growing up, we spent a lot of time together, and she would frequently visit my schools if classes weren’t going well. She also attended all of my IEPs from kindergarten to senior year of high school. She made sure that I saw her advocating for me so that one day I could advocate for myself! She always puts others first and makes sure that everyone has everything they need to succeed.”
Sydney Badeau lives in Wisconsin and has dyspraxia, a nonverbal learning disorder, and a sensory processing disorder

Sarvesh Chandran pictured with his mom

Sarvesh and his mom

“My mom is my biggest supporter. She believes in me and she gives me the confidence to believe in myself. My mom loves me unselfishly and she does her best every day to help me to live a happy and worry-free life. She encourages me to be brave and try new things. My mom advocates for me everywhere. I am very thankful for her. I feel safe and comfortable because of my mom.”
Sarvesh Chandran lives in Arizona and has autism and severe apraxia


These stories remind us: the best relationships are built on respect for each other’s journeys, struggles, growth, and dreams.

To the moms of people with disabilities: Thank you. For your tireless hearts, unwavering belief, and all the ways, loud and quiet, you lift up your children.

To the people who shared their stories: Your lives and leadership light the way, whether guided by a mom or forged on your own.

And to anyone for whom “mom” means something different: We honor your story, too. Not everyone has a mom or a safe relationship with their mom. This day can be complicated. If that’s true for you, we see you. Love doesn’t always follow one path. Whether your “mom” is a friend, a relative, a caregiver, or chosen family (or whether you’re still figuring it out), we honor the people who show up, stand by you, and believe in your worth.

We’re Family Caregivers of People With Disabilities & Here’s What We Want You to Know

They’re cheerleaders and crisis managers, nurses and advocates, therapists and service coordinators. They’re not just family members, they’re lifelines. Family caregivers are the backbone of care for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD), and their stories often go untold.

This November, for National Family Caregivers Month, we’re spotlighting seven individuals caring for their loved ones with IDD. Their insights challenge how our society views disability, family, and community.

The Arc’s 2023 Family and Individual Needs for Disability Supports (FINDS) survey highlights the need for better support systems for caregivers and their loved ones:

  • Over 50% report very high or extreme stress levels
  • 90% have seen their careers impacted
  • More than 4 in 5 have had to provide increased support

But numbers only tell part of the story. In this blog, family caregivers of people with IDD invite us into their worlds, where challenges and triumphs coexist and where love drives everything.

The Rewards & Challenges of Caregiving

Caregivers open up about the unexpected joys and daily hurdles they face.

Debbi Harris posing with her son Josh.

Debbi and Josh

Debbi Harris, mother to Josh (31) with complex medical needs: “It’s captivating to watch how Joshua navigates the complex world around him with what we consider to be so many limitations. But he has learned to use what he has in the best way he can to communicate, to gather information, to relate pain or contentment or frustration—and he’s proud of it. He has been through more medically than most people will ever experience, yet he comes back undiminished. The challenging aspect of being a parent or caregiver of a person with IDD is how the rest of the world perceives Josh. They limit his humanity and do not invest the time it takes to get to know him as the unique human that he is.”

A mother holds her young son and they are both smiling. The background is pure white with bouquets of flowers.

Dena and Eli

Dena Drabek, mother to Eli (6) with a congenital heart defect: “Eli has undergone three open-heart surgeries, seven cardiac catheterization procedures, and one round of ECMO life support. Watching your child endure so much from the very beginning takes a major emotional toll as a parent. On the flip side, we have a bond unlike most because of what we have been through together. This path has also encouraged us to celebrate all of life’s little moments and be grateful for every opportunity along the way.”

Ray Hemachandra, father to Nicholas (24) with autism and intellectual disability: “Being a caregiver for someone with intellectual and developmental disabilities is no different from being a caregiver for anyone else. You work to meet the individual’s needs; honor their strengths, their uniqueness, and their beauty; and appreciate every day and every moment spent together. You ask for help when you need it, too. A challenge is asking for help in a society and culture that see lesser value in disability and in disabled lives. A challenge is navigating and overcoming a scarcity-based public support system that constantly, relentlessly requires your loved one’s deficits be documented and emphasized.”

 

What Caregivers Want You to Know

Caregivers share candid truths about their lives and the support they need.

An older woman sits next to her sister, who has disabilities. They are looking at each other and smiling.

Patricia and Barbara

Barbara Davis, sister to Patricia (70) with intellectual and physical disabilities: “Better funding is needed but is a low priority in state and federal budgets. Families caring for someone with IDD are just like other families. They want each member of their family to be safe and healthy and to have the opportunity to reach their fullest potential.”

Em Braman, mother to Eden (17) with Down Syndrome & OCD: “The needs of the person you are caring for always come first so you may cancel or ask to reschedule get-togethers frequently,” she shares. “This is not due to not wanting to get together with the other person, it is because my loved one comes first. Our lives just look different and just because it looks different does not mean it is bad or less meaningful. My family enjoys life and enjoys living life together.”

Two women posing together for a selfie, smiling.

Jamie and Sam

Jamie Mistretta, sister to Sam (32) with intellectual disability and autism: “When a support service is unavailable, this limits my sister just as much as it limits me and my family. Her support services are what give her access to her everyday life. When a sibling or other family caregiver is sick or otherwise unavailable, our loved one still needs and deserves support.”

Mariela Azarpira, mother to Samir (22) with intellectual disability, hydrocephalus, and apraxia: “I want to tell people that it is important to fight for them, advocate for them, speak for them, include them, don’t let them give up on them, and don’t let them label them,” she asserts. “People with disabilities are perfect the way they are, so don’t outcast them and don’t allow anyone to do it. They matter too.”

Debbi Harris: “Many of our loved ones require attention 24/7 and staffing that care is a national crisis at this time. It can be exhausting. Caregivers experience chronic illnesses related to stress much more widely than others. I have chronic migraines and other stress-related health conditions. I try to write, or play the flute, or read, but I cannot focus long, and I am needed all of the time. I often feel lonely and isolated. I have my immediate family around me but find myself craving relationships I see others experiencing on social media. Even if I had the opportunity, though, I am usually exhausted and overwhelmed. I don’t have the capacity to participate socially in a normal way, and I don’t fit in. People are afraid I will talk about my son. They think their problems will seem too small or superficial, so they avoid me because they still do need to vent, as we all do. And, the aspects of caregiving I need to talk about, there is no one to listen.”

How Caregiving Shifts Worldviews

Caregivers reveal how their experiences have reshaped their outlook on life.

A woman and her daughter stand together outside, smiling.

Eden and Em

Em Braman: “As my child gets older, I see accessibility as a much larger issue than when she was younger. It frustrates me that while she can physically access places, there are minimal accommodations to assist her in accessing the understanding needed in those locations. For example, a museum without plain language guides for the displays or a listening session where materials are not sent out ahead of time for her to read and reread for understanding or when a medical office will not let her come in ahead of time for a preview of the office to calm her anxiety.”

A mom and her son with disabilities standing together in a swimming pool, smiling.

Mariela and Samir

Mariela Azarpira: “I am a mama bear 24/7. I am in contact with his program and aide every day asking questions like, ‘How was his day? What else do we need to do for him?’ It’s important to have clear communication with each person he is involved with daily. I want him to thrive and make sure everyone is on the same page regarding my son.”

Ray Hemachandra: “For parents of children with disabilities, the responsibility for two lives carries across the lifespan—not just caring about that person’s life, but full responsibility for the care of that life. For example, the normal fear around losing your job, getting ill, or dying is much more about what happens to your child, including your adult child, if and when that happens. Who is going to care for your child? Who is going to love your child? I wouldn’t trade my son for anything or anyone in the world. But I carry all that with me every day.”

What People Get Wrong

Caregivers set the record straight on common misunderstandings about their lives and loved ones.

Dena Drabek: “I often sense that others feel pity for our situation. The commitment I have to my son is not about what I have to give up. It’s about investing in him, nurturing his potential, and helping him discover his own unique gifts so that he can share them with the rest of the world.”

A dad and his son stand together in front of hay bales. They are holding hands and wearing t-shirts that say, "Disabality Rights are Human Rights."

Nicholas and Ray

Barbara Davis: “There sometimes is the assumption that acting as my sibling’s caregiver is only a burden. It can be difficult, but I love my sibling. Being involved in her care is extremely rewarding.”

Ray Hemachandra: “My son isn’t a burden. He’s a blessing. When he is supported appropriately for his needs, he can contribute just as much to his family, to his community, and to our world as anyone else. He wants to know you and be your friend.”

Jamie Mistretta: “I am often asked, ‘Do you think your life would be different if your sister didn’t have a disability?’ I cannot even imagine a life where my sister doesn’t have a disability. My sister’s disability is a large part of who she is; it is a large part of her character. Disability or not, my sister will still be my maid of honor at my wedding someday. I love her for everything she is and everything she is not.”

This National Family Caregivers Month, let’s do more than recognize these hidden heroes. Let’s listen to them, support them, and work towards a world that values their essential role. Their stories show us what unconditional love and true family mean.

A young, Black man with Down syndrome stands in front of a fabric backdrop. He is hold a microphone as if he is ready to sing.

An All-Too-Common Story of Untapped Potential

A young, Black man with Down syndrome stands in front of a fabric backdrop. He is hold a microphone as if he is ready to sing.Marcus Stewart’s smile lights up the room as he talks about his dreams and his latest TikTok dance moves. At 23, the young man from Waldorf, MD aspires to be a pastor or a DJ, and he loves cleaning. He also wants to make enough money to get his own apartment. But Marcus, who has Down syndrome, faces an uphill battle in achieving his goals, particularly because he can’t find paid employment.

“One big misconception is that I am not able to follow directions, learn, or be employable,” Marcus says. His words cut to the heart of the challenges faced by many in the intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD) community.

The statistics paint a stark picture. Working-aged people with disabilities have significantly lower employment rates, around half the rates of their counterparts without disabilities. When considering people of all ages, the gap widens further. In 2023, people with disabilities were three times less likely to be employed.

These numbers don’t reflect Marcus’s capabilities or work ethic. Through his workplace readiness program, he has volunteered in a diverse range of roles that showcase his adaptability and willingness to learn. He’s stocked shelves at Big Lots, sorted clothes at a thrift store, assisted with administrative tasks at a church, performed housekeeping duties at a hotel, tackled landscaping work, carried out janitorial duties at an assisted living facility and public schools, and helped with food prep at Texas Roadhouse.

“I take care of myself and protect myself and my family,” Marcus asserts. “I show up to work on time, I’m polite and kind, and I’m focused on my work.” He’s dedicated to each role he takes on, yet he can’t get past the biases and discrimination of hiring managers and AI hiring tools.

Marcus has valuable skills and a lot to offer to any workplace. He excelled in school and, as he shares, “I loved math and reading.” He was also active in sports, participating in track, tennis, and bocce. Marcus finished school at 18, graduating on time with his class, and has been in workforce readiness programs ever since.

A young Black man with Down syndrome wears a light blue button up. He is standing with his arm around his mom, who is wearing a hot pink jacket. They are both smiling.Marcus’s mother, Tawana, has been his fierce advocate from day one. “When he was first diagnosed, his first geneticist told me that he’s not going to amount to much. But I said my son will get every opportunity that’s available,” she recalls. “I made myself present in workshops and other groups of parents of children with Down syndrome. I signed him up for sports. I showed up and was very vocal.” She is frustrated by the lack of opportunities for Marcus in adulthood. “Give him a chance,” she pleads. “He gets up every day without an alarm, makes his own meals, never missed a day of school, takes great care of his nephew and our two dogs. He’s more responsible than most people I know, and he’s capable of so much.” Tawana tears up and Marcus puts his arm around her shoulders.

Her message to employers is clear: “Show him what to do and give him a chance to learn.” She adds, “The value in investing in this community is incredible, it makes the company a better place for everybody. More exposure helps educate people and create more acceptance of people with disabilities.”

Despite his employment challenges, Marcus maintains a rich social life. Beyond his TikTok presence, he enjoys spending time with friends. “My friends are nice to me and we do fun things like play Uno, go out to eat, go bowling, and go to the movies,” he says. In his free time, he likes to “relax, watch P Valley and Power, play football and basketball, and take care of my mom and my big sister.”

Tawana urges other parents of children with disabilities: “Seek out resources that are available and most importantly advocate for your child. Advocacy and education are two things I’ve been doing since he’s been born. You have to advocate—no one else is going to do it. The best cheerleaders are the family.”

A young, Black man with Down syndrome wears a black short sleeve polo shirt and stands outside of a house. He is wearing glasses and has a serious look on his face.As we celebrate National Disability Employment Awareness Month and Down Syndrome Awareness Month, Marcus’s story is a powerful reminder of the untapped potential within the IDD community. His resilience, skills, and can-do attitude, coupled with his family’s unwavering support, show what’s possible for people with disabilities.

“I’m smart, I’m strong, I’m thoughtful and respectful. I love my family,” Marcus says, summing up his character in a few words. “I want to work so I can be independent and get my own apartment.” His dream is what we all wish for: autonomy, respect, and the opportunity to contribute meaningfully to society.

Marcus Stewart is ready to show the world what he can do. Are we ready to give him, and countless others like him, that chance?

Kris, a man with cerebral palsy, is smiling. He's holding a number 1 up with his hand.

Comcast and The Arc Collaborate to Improve Digital Skills and Make Life-Changing Impact for People With Disabilities

Digital access and skills are a critical component of modern life. In 2023, The Arc and Comcast teamed up to help people with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD) leverage technology to open the door to new experiences in their communities.

The Arc and Comcast have a long-standing partnership to do this work. The Arc’s national network of nearly 600 chapters provides vital resources and services to individuals with IDD and their families to promote greater independence and opportunity in the community—and through this partnership, since 2017, more than 3,000 clients have received basic digital skills training.

The program continues to expand what’s possible for people with IDD in their professional and personal lives—giving them the tools to chart their own course, just like we all want to do.

Meet Kris, a 59-year-old man with cerebral palsy.

Kris, a man with cerebral palsy, is smiling. He's holding a number 1 up with his hand.Kris lives with his sister’s family in his hometown of Greely, Colorado, and has been successfully employed for 40 years, currently working full time at the busiest grocery store in town. He is an avid sports fan—Go Bears!—has a busy social life, and because of his gregarious personality he is a bit of a local celebrity, traveling around town on his e-bike. Kris has become very active in civic service—involved with the Chamber of Commerce, volunteering at local nonprofits, and serving in leadership roles at both The Arc of Weld County and on The Arc’s National Council of Self-Advocates.

To be effective in his new roles, Kris had to better leverage modern technology and communication platforms. He was comfortable with the basic use of his cell phone and his laptop, and The Arc of Weld County provided tech coaching to give him the confidence with the more advanced technology he needed to be successful. Kris learned how to navigate complex websites with multiple drop-down navigation structures and use passwords to access secure portals. His tech coaches showed him how to sync his calendars and email on both devices to stay on top of his busy schedule. He has even mastered accessing virtual meetings. After a long day, his eyes get tired and email can become stressful, so Kris taught himself how to use the read aloud feature to make it easier.

Kris continues to get weekly tech coaching sessions to keep advancing his skills. He is learning to use folders to organize his documents, better managing calendar invites, learning tactics to ensure he is responsive, and understanding how to identify and handle junk or malicious email. Like many of us, passwords and computer updates can still “throw him for a loop” from time to time, but he stays patient, and as he says, “It feels good when you figure something out.”

By advancing his technology skills, Kris has been able to pursue work that he feels is incredibly important. He shares his lived experience as a person with IDD while counseling disability organizations at the local, state, and national level on how to better support people with disabilities. “I know what it feels like to feel like you are not heard. I want to help people be heard.”

Meet Roselyn, a 60-year-old woman with Down syndrome.

Roselyn, a woman with Down syndrome, is standing in front of a house and smiling. She's wearing a colorful blouse and jeans. Her hands are on her hips.Roselyn has lived with her mother and received support from The Arc of Greater Indianapolis since 1981. During the week, Roselyn works at Corteva Agriscience through The Arc of Greater Indianapolis’ employment services. She works as part of a team that assists scientists in preparing seedling trays for growing new plants, hosing down trays when experiments are complete, and keeping the greenhouse labs clean. Roselyn is very proud of her work and the independence she has from earning a paycheck. She recently bought a kitchen table set and used her tax check to buy a new washer and dryer.

However, when her mom had to be moved into a nursing home quite abruptly, Roselyn needed an emergency placement. The Arc of Greater Indianapolis helped move her into a new living environment with staff support. Roselyn enjoys the financial independence that comes with working—for example, she has a standing hair appointment every two weeks for some pampering at the salon. With more activities in the community, Roselyn started wanting to enjoy some alone time without staff having to be with her. This was going to require some tech coaching to do so safely.

Roselyn had used cell phones over the years, but she never really explored the features they offered and would either lose or break them. If she wanted to call family, staff would have to help her. Staff at The Arc of Greater Indianapolis worked with Roselyn regularly for a couple of months as part of these tech coaching sessions. They helped her learn how to call and text family, friends, and staff and how to contact help if she ever feels unsafe. She has learned how to access the internet and use apps like Voice to Text to look things up and connect with friends. Now, she gets time to herself each day. Roselyn gets home from work around 1:30, but her staff don’t arrive until 3:30. She either calls or texts them, though, to let them know that she made it home safely. Then she spends some time searching for videos on dogs and cats (she loves showing these to her staff later) as well as watching her favorite shows online (she especially loves Night Court and Law & Order). If the weather is bad on Sundays, Roselyn even watches church online. When she’s not working or using her phone, she likes doing 5,000-piece puzzles, going shopping, and seeing her Colts or Pacers play.

Through tech coaching, Roselyn has achieved a newfound sense of independence. You never fully appreciate how nice it sometimes is to be alone if you’ve never been able to experience it. Roselyn loves her work, friends, family, and the staff who work with her. However, sometimes it’s wonderful to just spend some time alone.

“When we provide access to digital skills training, we create opportunities and pathways to independence that can be life-changing, especially for those living with disabilities,” said Dalila Wilson-Scott, Executive Vice President and Chief Diversity Officer of Comcast Corporation. “Partnerships, like the one we’re proud to share with The Arc, are at the heart of what drives us each day at Comcast because of the many lives we’re able to help impact. We’re so very honored to continue to grow our work together and help enrich even more lives.”

Comcast’s partnership with The Arc is part of Project UP, the company’s comprehensive initiative to address digital inequities and help build a future of unlimited possibilities. Backed by a $1 billion commitment to reach tens of millions of people, Project UP is focused on connecting people to the Internet, advancing economic mobility, and opening doors for the next generation of innovators, entrepreneurs, storytellers, and creators.

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A family posing for a photo in a living room. One of the sons has disabilities and is in a wheelchair.

Spotlighting The Arc’s Changemakers: Debbi Harris, Vice President of the Board

If anyone embodies the fierce, compassionate spirit of advocacy at the heart of The Arc, it’s Debbi Harris, MA, MS, the 2023 Vice President of our national Board of Directors. For over 25 years, Debbi has fought tirelessly to shape systems that fully include people with disabilities and complex medical needs, and it all starts with Josh.

A baby in a small tub. There is a piece of gauze taped to his chest.Debbi’s son Josh was born eight weeks early with a grade four brain hemorrhage. As she shares, “He was one of the sickest babies in the neonatal intensive care unit. It started our roller coaster of a journey of having a child with complex medical needs and disabilities.”

Securing reliable home nursing supports has always been a struggle. When he was an infant, there was a constant rotation of providers coming to her door, many of whom had limited training.

“It was really scary… Josh was harmed because people were coming in who weren’t well-oriented or trained to care for him. At just 18 months old, Josh was hospitalized three times because of this.”

Debbi and her husband Victor also struggled with their careers while managing Josh’s needs and raising their two other children. Victor was often called away for active duty with the military. Debbi worked full time in a traditional office setting, often working into the night to meet her deadlines and hold onto their health insurance. “That insurance was what was providing Josh’s life-sustaining medical care. But because of the hospitalizations, I gave up my career to stay home and care for him when he was two years old.”

A family, parents and three sons, posing for a photo in a living room. One of the sons has disabilities and is in a wheelchair.Out of crisis came purpose. Debbi soon immersed her family in The Arc’s chapter support systems, connecting her sons to sibling workshops and herself to a parent networking group. “We still count on those relationships for support today,” added Debbi.

Not long after, her local chapter of The Arc called on her to testify in support of the Tax Equity and Fiscal Responsibility Act (TEFRA) and better standards for care workers. Years later, when Josh was headed off to school for the first time, Debbi found herself in battle for nursing support. School officials told her that Josh couldn’t go to their school unless she paid for a nurse to accompany him during the school day. “I was so jolted by what they said, and I knew we had a big fight on our hands, so I went to The Arc and they stuck by me,” she recalled. “They looked up precedent cases, got their big-time lawyers involved… and we won.”

Debbi not only secured Josh’s rights to nursing care within the school, but her victory paved the way for other families. Now the school must notify every family whose child needs nursing care that they are entitled to support in school.

Debbi constantly found herself in circles with The Arc, including a fundraiser at the home of a family that had two daughters with disabilities. That led to leadership roles in chapters of The Arc, from serving on the Board of The Arc of Dakota County to The Arc of Minnesota and as Board Chair for The Arc of Greater Twin Cities. Debbi has been involved in so many aspects of community advocacy, including working with local and federal legislators. She’s also a published writer illuminating caregiving and equity issues in medical journals.

Debbi’s exceptional contributions earned her the prestigious Betty Hubbard Family Advocacy Award from The Arc of Minnesota in 2013. Her family got to witness her receiving the award. “It meant a lot that they were able to be proud of me in that way,” Debbi shares.

Debbi Harris posing with her son Josh.Once The Arc of the United States got word of Debbi’s powerhouse advocacy, we invited her to apply for the Board. Her proudest volunteer moments have been spearheading the creation of The Arc’s anti-racism position statement and filming a campaign for paid leave in her home. For Debbi, The Arc provides community, kinship, and collective power to drive social change. She points to our strong advocacy at the heart of improving quality-of-life for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD). And, as she adds, our work is “authentic, grassroots, and rooted in the lived experiences of people with disabilities. We see dignity in all people and we’re willing to make sure that everyone sees that dignity.”

For over 25 years, Debbi’s been on a mission to teach parents how to effectively advocate for their children and to shine a spotlight on the marginalization of people with IDD and the caregiving crisis, and that mission continues today. Debbi is eager to continue leveraging her passion, wisdom, and connections to uplift the disability community nationwide. Her relentless drive reminds us that within all of us lies the power to champion inclusive communities.

There is a man wearing a tan suit with a floral button up shirt underneath. He is smiling.

DSP Spotlight: Lawrence Discusses Hardship Imposed on Direct Care Workforce

There is a man wearing a tan suit with a floral button up shirt underneath. He is smiling.Working with people with disabilities is Lawrence’s long-time passion. He has worked as a direct support professional (DSP) in New York and Texas, both before and after serving in the Army. As a DSP, Lawrence takes pride in the trusted role he has in the lives of people with disabilities. He helps transport people to and from appointments, gives medicine, cooks, cleans, dresses, changes, and feeds people who may not be able to do these things for themselves. He even seeks out specialized training that is needed to support people who have challenging behaviors that may result in injury to themselves and others.

For years, the DSP field has been undervalued and underfunded. For Lawrence, this comes from a lack of recognition and social awareness.

“It is important for people to recognize the skills, training, and importance of our profession and how comparable it is to jobs with similar requirements,” says Lawrence. “I have performed in nursing and emergency services roles; I can say these skills easily translate to direct support professionals. However, these other professions receive not only more public credit but also a substantially larger salary… I have served in this profession for 18 years and don’t have the heart to leave. But right now, I am only earning just over minimum wage and having to work 60 hours a week.”

Dedicated direct support professionals do their best every day to care for people with disabilities and seniors. However, due to poor pay, it is hard for many DSPs to support themselves and their families on this below-average wage.

Recently, the crisis impacted a family that Lawrence works with. When the mother could no longer physically care for her teenage son, Lawrence stepped up. In Texas, it can take 6 years, on average, to get Medicaid home and community-based services. During this time, many people with disabilities end up in institutions, like nursing homes, because they can’t get the support they need to live at home. To prevent this from happening, Lawrence offered to house the teenager and care for him in his own home, at his own expense. “I support him out of the very wages I am paid by Medicaid for my work. It is my choice, but I shouldn’t have to do this for the young man to get the help he needs,” says Lawrence.

Being a direct support professional requires many critical skills but is often easily overlooked by those making decisions about Medicaid funding. As a result of this oversight, there are not enough DSPs to help all the people who need care. The low pay scale often means that people are not able to gain proper training or stay long enough in a DSP role to learn all the skills needed for the position.

“It is my prayer that our government works diligently to support the people with disabilities in our communities and their families. It is desperately important that the processes for funding, equipment, placement, and care be streamlined and that we recognize the value and appropriately pay those who work with people in need. It is through this that we will drastically improve the quality of care and quality of life of those with disabilities.”