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My Brother, My Role Model

By Jui Agrawal, Guest Blogger

I am the lucky younger sister of Chinmay Khaladkar. When I think about him, I smile because of all the happy memories that he brings to mind. Whether it is his love for music, cars, travel, or eggplant parmesan, he enriches my life beyond words. Having been born with Cerebral Palsy, and the complications that have accompanied his condition, he has unyielding optimism that makes me proud to be his sister.

My family has been lucky enough to travel extensively, expand our worldview and experience the cultures of many countries. However, the one journey that helped me grow the most has been at home, as I’ve watched my role model, my brother, grow and become the most loving and happiest of people.

Through Chinmay’s eyes you see a world where everyone is good and intentions are always pure. He has a way of talking to strangers, laughing at your most lame joke, and making long-lasting friendships. His celebrations always bring together his biggest fans, whether it’s his therapist of 30 years, friends from kindergarten, or family from across the country- a reminder of all the people he has touched with his love.

Over the years, as our family has celebrated Diwali, the Hindu new year, there is a ceremony when the brother gives the sister a gift as a token of appreciation. Chinmay, not having the ability to drive on his own and get me a present, has repeatedly put his paycheck in an envelope addressed to me in his scrawling letters- flooring me his gesture, and showing me the true meaning of selflessness.

Starting at a young age Chinmay has always been the one looking out for me. Whether it was holding my scared small hand as we went into the darkened basement for a game of hide and seek, or coming to my defense when my parents were angry at me for missing curfew, he has always consoled and protected me, being a true protective older brother.

Despite our connection, we’ve shared the same problems that all siblings face- the squabbles, the jealousies and the competitions. Chinmay will never graduate from college or drive a car, and as I’ve hit these milestones throughout the years, he has had a hard time dealing with my moving on from our days of playing pretend. Though I have spread my proverbial wings, he feels as though I have left him behind in my journey- Chinmay, an eternal child at heart, will never fully understand that it is because of his love and support that I have learned to fly. For both of us.

As we journey through adulthood, I have become increasingly inspired by Chinmay and realized that I want to dedicate my career to the advocacy of people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. I know that without him, I would not see this extraordinary community as having the humility, grace, and determination that they embody.

Jui Agrawal is pursuing a Master in Public Policy degree at the Bloustein School for Planning and Public Policy at Rutgers University. She currently works at the John J. Heldrich Center for Workforce Development on campus assisting with research related to disability employment. Jui has spent time working in Washington, DC, both at the Pew Charitable Trusts and a boutique government relations firm focusing on environmental, tax, and health policy issues. Most recently, she has interned with The Arc of California and United Cerebral Policy, and will be joining The Arc’s national office in Washington, DC this summer 2013 Paul Marchand intern.